Hijab, Modesty, and Respect

Recently I heard an interview of a Muslim woman discussing the hijab, the traditional head covering worn by many women believers in Islam.

While many Americans have the idea that Muslim woman are oppressed and subjugated, and forced to cover their bodies in public, many Western Muslim women do not hold such view.

While it is true that the custom or practice of hijab varies in different parts of the world, and there are most definitely women who are kept invisible as they disappear under their black covers hiding even their face, there are also many Muslim women in developed countries who have a different experience.

The women being interviewed, when asked about her decision to wear the head covering stated that she was not forced to cover her head, but chose to dress in a way she considers modest and respectful.

Continuing, she stated that by covering and dressing modestly, she knew that no man has objectified her, or considered her body for his sexual pleasure.

I sense she is accurate and I admire her desire to be respected for who she is as a person not objectified or considered valuable for her body

I am not in support of a country, religion, or society that requires, or demands women cover themselves from head to toe, in some cases including their hands and face, however I defend and support a woman's choice to dress as she feels appropriate within the bounds of decency. In addition, so long as others are not harmed and people are not coerced or manipulated, I support all of humankind to embrace their particular faith tradition or religious belief as they wish.

What struck me most about this particular interview was the idea that in order to not feel objectified the Muslim woman felt a need to cover her body in this way.

I had to wonder... is our modern society such that women are viewed as sex objects if their bodies are not completely covered?

It brought back a memory of a former Muslim friend, who moved to the United States from the mid-East, to attend Graduate School. We often discussed the differences and similarities between our various countries and cultures.

During one particular insightful conversation, she stated that while we look at the women of her country as repressed and degraded, the women of her country looked upon American women as repressed and degraded.

I was stunned.

She explained, that the idea of having to dress up, put on make-up, spend hours on one's hair, wear tight fitting and otherwise uncomfortable clothing to appear sexy, while trying to look like a supermodel seemed very odd and sad.

She elaborated suggesting that the idea that women feel a need to be valued by their attractiveness was demeaning from her perspective. In addition she felt American women have bought into the idea their worth is based on how sexy men find them.

I spent some time pondering this new idea.

My friend had a point!

Have we, in the West created a society where women actually enjoy being objectified?

Is this any better than being invisible?

It is certainly true that in the United States, there is a ubiquitous, extraordinary emphasis on attractiveness. It is also true that a woman's value is often based on her appearance.

Is the answer to hide one's face and body under a black cloth?

span style="font-family:courier new;font-size:130%;color:#339999;">I suggest neither option is healthy and in the best interest of women, men, or humankind.

Will humankind ever evolve to a place where women are valued and honored for their humanness?

Will there ever come a time, when women do not have to hide themselves and become insignificant to participate in life, or expose their bodies to be considered significant?

As men honor and respect women as something other than a form, and as women honor and respect themselves as something other than their bodies, we will create a society where women and men can interact with decency and civility without women needing to either hide or expose themselves.


*Please note, I am not in any way, dismissing the horrific and cruel oppression and subjugation of women in many parts of the world!