Why Some Women Pick Jerks

I had a specific question that needs its own article.

Why do some women pick not so great guys?

I have shared some of the dynamics of evolutionary sexual strategies used by men that linger in the human today, so let me also share some of the female sexual strategies that are today, not in the best interest of women. In other words... why some women pick not-so-great men.

While behavior is complex and as I have previously stated there are many factors involved as we try to understand humans, this post is reflective of our evolutionary past and the unconscious instincts and sexual strategies in women that may lead to choosing a partner who is not a man we would consider healthy and decent by today's standards.

Again we must go back millions of years as male and female creatures began the quest to discover the best want to bring their genetic material into the world to continue their lineage.

Our ancestral animals had two needs... to survive and to bring offspring into the world who would survive.

To accomplish these two goals, females discovered that if a male could help provide resources for her and her baby, she and her offspring would have a better chance of surviving.

So, simplistically, females came up with two different sexual strategies (and a few combinations).

1. They could offer one male unlimited sexual opportunities thereby keeping him nearby for protection and resources or...

2. They could offer many males opportunities for sexual pleasure and receive few resources from each. Since in this situation, males would be unsure of their parentage, they would be much less likely to offer resources to the child but if many men provided even a few resources a child may have a slightly better chance to survive, than the infant would if no male were involved at all.

Today, as we look back, we see clear evidence that the first strategy is biologically more beneficial and productive. The very fact that males and females pair bond is evidence of the evolutionary advancement for men to stay with one woman, and for women to want to be with one man.

However, we certainly have tendencies within our DNA for both strategies. Depending on many factors, women may resort to the second and less effective strategy.

What this looks like today is...

Women who are more inclined to be with a man who is unfaithful, dishonest, uncaring, or who lacks integrity and decency are those who may be adopting the less healthy sexual strategy.

Why? Because these men are less likely to attach to one woman. These are the men who have chosen a secondary sexual strategy, that of spreading their genetic material with as many females as possible RATHER than the more evolutionarily productive strategy of attaching to one woman.

So, now the question is, why would a woman choose a less advanced or biologically beneficial strategy?

This gets a little tricky....

As we look at evolutionary history, a female who does not think she will be able to have a male in her life full time, will adopt the less ideal option which would be to engage a male (or several males) that will be there part time or on occasion. It is a strategy in which one engages by default.

Having described this dynamic, as humans we can consciously choose to make new and more productive and healthy choices. We do not need to follow our primitive instincts if we bring a new awareness into our heart and minds.

Women and men today, with the knowledge and understanding we have, can decide what sort of relationship we want and can make choices that will bring our goals and desires into reality.