Name calling is never appropriate in a relationship.
Of course calling our partners nice names and using sweet nouns to express love is great... I'm talking about the rude, disrespectful name calling we often see in abusive relationships.
We all know name calling in a relationship is a sign of immaturity. It reminds us of fifth grade recess when someone didn't get their way. Most adults have left this silliness long ago. But not everyone!
Why is name calling a sign of a not-so-great guy?
Aside from the very immaturity of it all, it is very hurtful. One can't undo what one says. Words can hurt and name calling, often occurring during times of anger can hurt deeply.
Name calling in a relationship is a reflection of the disrespect one feels for one's partner. A man simply does not call those he respects names. So if a guy is calling you names you know he does not respect you.
Name calling often is a sign of a guy needing to feel dominant and strong. If he puts you down enough he will feel better about himself. If he can get you to feel worthless, he will feel more powerful. The worse you feel about yourself the more he feels in control of you.
Of course we all know that this disturbing need for power and control originates from feelings of weakness and insecurity, nevertheless, some guys use name calling to put "his woman" in her place.
It is never appropriate.
4 thoughts and insights:
oh heck yeah, babies and that would be insulting babies in fact! when we get in a row we know when it's gone to far when the name calling starts and back off, not always easy cause there are so many emotions involved but the moment you get personal rather than try to solve the problem by sticking to the issue at hand you don't get anywhere!
Hey Tisha... yeah, when the name calling starts it is time to take a step back! :-) You are sooooo right! XO Jen
My boyfriend calls me the worst names in the world...the "c" word, whore, retard, idiot, only to name a few; is there help for this kind of person or should I leave him and never look back? The names hurt me so bad and he knows this. He uses it as ammunition now during an arguement. After the arguement he LOVES me sooo much; he's so sorry, it won't happen again. I get called these names at least once a week. What should I do?
howtotellifaguyisajerk.blogspot.com; You saved my day again.
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