How do you know if a man is in love with you?Here are ten signs to look for to help you know if a man loves you. Not every man will do everything on the list but I'm getting this straight from men so it must be pretty accurate!
1. Does he tell you? Does he express his love? Guys often don't say the words unless they feel it.
2. Does he look for excuses to be around you or communicate with you?
3. Does he stay interested after sex? Or is he interested in being with you even when there is not sexual intimacy?
4. Is he interested in your life? Or is the relationship all about him?
5. Does he put you first over ESPN or the latest video game? Guys who are in love want to be with their lover more than they want to watch the next football game.
6. Does he long for you when you are not together? Does he text, call, or email you often just to connect?
7. Does he look for ways to surprise and delight you? Does he do nice things for you, bring your flowers, write cute notes, or give you little gifts?
8. Does he want to care for you? Does he what to help you and make you happy?
9. Does he invest in the relationship? Does he give his time, energy, and emotions to you?
10. Does he want to be emotionally intimate with you. Does the relationship consist of more than the superficial? Does he share his thoughts and feelings with you?
So, if you are wondering, look for the above signs and trust your instinct!
Men.... please feel free to comment and/or add to this list!
17 thoughts and insights:
A man who is in love with you can't live without you. It's tough breathing when you are not around.
Hi Tisha... YES, YES, YES! You are so right girlfriend! :-)
BTW... I LOVED your post this morning! Great quote and who doesn't love... "a whole new world"? I'm linking to your site!
Jennifer
Pretty good signs.. and very true :)
So is 9/10, good? I do struggle with #5... then again, we'll be celebrating our 24th anniversary on Jan. 15. So, I think I've done all right for myself!
OK.. Roy, what can I say you pass the test! LOL! First you do 9 out of 10 things to show your love... GREAT! AND, you own your behavior! (See tip 15)! All I can say is you are a real man! :-) YAY!
Jennifer
Can't disagree with any of these.
Hi Joseph....
Glad to know you agree! Please feel free to add your thoughts and insights any time! :-)
Jennifer
First let me say I have never seen a blog online that speaks as true as yours. You really have relationships down pat. I am a 19 year old guy, and I found your site by looking for ways to be a better guy for my girlfriend.
A couple ways of showing love that I thought I would share.
1. Does he respect your parents?
2. Does he make sure to pick out movies that don't have girls showing off their lack of self-respect?
3. Will he ask you before he goes out of town or tell you?
4. Is your opinion a factor is his personal decisions?
5. If he's not spending the night, will he make sure to still tuck you in and say goodnight, or is 10 minutes too long to wait for you to get ready for bed (has to get up early for work).
6. Will he quit smoking because you hate it?
7. Does he understand that you may get jealous, and will he try to distance himself from women that he has slept with in the past?
8. Does he make sure to tell you how beautiful you are every day?
Why is communication so hard for some guys?
Hi Blankstate,
OK, let me just say you are amazing!
Seriously, I am so impressed with you.. you should write a book or something!
Not too many nineteen year old guys are as understanding as are you!
Big congratulations and keep adding your thoughts!
Hugs,
Jennifer
Hi AppleEater,
Great question... I think I will write a post to answer you!
But briefly, it has to do with evolution and inculturation. :-(
Early women gained communication skills sitting around the campfire; they survived by sharing techniques and inventions.
Men OTOH, may not have needed to talk much out on the hunt! They may have survived better by being silent so they could catch their prey. ;-)
And, today, modern society promotes the idea that men shouldn't share their emotions; that it is girly to be open and tender.
What nonsense huh?
Thanks for your question... and I am a big apple eater too. I eat at least one a day!
:-)
Jennifer
Hi Jennifer:
I have a man who says he loves me repeatedly. We've only known each other for a few months, but in that time we've talked for hours on the phone, spent time together (from going out to eat, to the mundane - babysitting his grandchildren with him.) He has come to my house and done repairs on it, and won't accept any money. He has met my family, who likes him and my children who like him. I've seen him help strangers fix flat tires, help his elderly neighbors by shoveling their driveways or picking up items from the store.
I keep holding myself back from saying I love you to him because I'm afraid people will feel we're rushing things. He's 58 and I'm 47, both of us are divorced with older children. What's going on? I'm a confident business woman, who is secure in herself - I don't feel I need a man to complete who I am, but I feel that if I don't snatch this man up, I will regret it for the rest of my life.
Is it too soon???
No it is not too soon! A man will only tell you so many times that he loves you without you responding. Just follow his lead...courtship is like slow dancing...let him lead or you will fall all over yourself. Only tell him you love him if you really do. If you don't he will go elsewhere...wouldn't you if the tables were reversed? Good luck!
Jennifer
Hi Anonymous 2-9,
Just so there is no confusion a reader named Jennifer wrote the previous comment! :-) (love to see the discussion)!
Thank you for writing and I am sorry I missed your comment until today!
I'm thinking that if you love this man then it is quite appropriate to tell him! :-)
There are lots of reasons why it may feel uncomfortable to say "I love you". Often it is very symbolic of a commitment and can feel like a huge step in the relationship. But I know from personal experience (smile) that we can truly love someone after a short time!
You sound like you have a great man and I wish you the very best...
Hugs,
Jennifer
So what does it mean when a man does all of these things, and more....then tells you he doesn't love you? Im confident that he didn't have bad intentions, he is a really good person, and he hasn't seen anyone else since we broke up. Any insight?
Came across this when I am trying to get my mind clear...
I was divorced with a son (taking care by my mom in TX) while I working and living (with my bf) in NY...
When my mom and son were here in NY to look for me for a short stay, my bf said he can't accept my son and my family, to him they are just unwanted oursiders in the unit he rented. He can't give his commitment to me but he said he don't plan to leave me...
I know I am so stupid to live with him... still.. while he said I am not his family member yet... My mind is so confused that I really don't know how to judge if he really love me.. Any help?
my boyfriend totally does ALL these things!!!
and i freakin LOVE your blog jennifer! i've referred all my girlfriends to it!
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