There is only one way to let a guy know he doesn't control you.
You SHOW him.
Talking, crying, writing, pouting, yelling, screaming, do not work.
The only way to not be controlled to is take control! As soon as you stand up for yourself and don't give your power away, a guy will get the message.
The question I have though, is why do you want a guy who has issues with control? Guys with power and control issues are not great men.
Women tend to forgive, to make things work, to want to please. These are great traits in some circumstances. They are not great qualities if it means you are feeling controlled by your partner.
You deserve a healthy relationship filled with respect, equality, support, and love. You are not a child or servant.
8 thoughts and insights:
Amen, sister! Wish I would've learned this lesson 25 years ago...
Hey Paula...
Nice to see you!! :-)
Better late than never? (I'm hoping)! LOL!
I've linked to your great blog!
Jennifer
The women, and men for that matter, that are being controlled, want to be controlled, right? Otherwise they would make changes. And for the record, nobody can control anybody without physically restraining them. We are in complete control of every part of our lives. When we blame others for our problems, we play the victim game. "You make me sad!" "You make me so angry!" Don't we have a decision in that? So when things go wrong, we blame others. And when they go right, we get the credit?
Hey Advanced Soul... Yes... we have to stop blaming others which was my point. The only way to not be controlled is to take control! Exactly!
Thanks for your thoughts...
Jennifer
Hallelujah...but i just wished I read this 3 years ago!!! You are soooo true. Thank you though, I am now able to accept my divorce which I will file after reading this.
God bless you....
Sharon
hi, have been reading your blog and its amazing...the problem i face is that I am from inida, and in our culture we are taught to put a 100% commitment in marriage...you only walk out if things are very bad. I won't say things are extremely bad in my marriage, but I do feel that my husband has emotionally abused me many many times over time. We have a child and I am an educated working woman. Every instinct tells me to walk out and start over....but friends and family counsel me to stay....its extremely confusing, as I am reacting with both my heart/ feelings and then the conflict with ym cultural conditioning.
well i just met this guy from the internetfor 3 months we just met yesterday, he told me that he liked me alot... first tme we met he took me out to eat then we went to the beach he grabbed me and kissed me, i kissed him back because i liked him,then ones we got more comfortable we stared talking alot more and flirting alot more we staretd kissing AND THE N I GAVED him some oral sex and he grabed my but when i was in te action... yea i know it was the first time but it happend after thet we were like nithung happend and we stared talking againg he stared talking to me about his personal life something bad that really happened to him.. i felt even more comfortable and i did to i told him something persona about me and stuff.. he once told me that if theres aby time i need something he can give it to me... like food, money, clothes, he seem a real nce guy like he was in the phone.. he also told me that he loved my face and i was a cutie... he liked the way i am (personality) but my question is does he just like me alot or is he in love with me or what?
well i just met this guy from the internetfor 3 months we just met yesterday, he told me that he liked me alot... first tme we met he took me out to eat then we went to the beach he grabbed me and kissed me, i kissed him back because i liked him,then ones we got more comfortable we stared talking alot more and flirting alot more we staretd kissing AND THE N I GAVED him a blowjob and he grabed my ass when i was in te action... yea i know it was the first time but it happend after thet we were like nithung happend and we stared talking againg he stared talking to me about his personal life something bad that really happened to him.. i felt even more comfortable and i did to i told him something persona about me and stuff.. he once told me that if theres aby time i need something he can give it to me... like food, money, clothes, he seem a real nce guy like he was in the phone.. he also told me that he loved my face and i was a cutie... he liked the way i am (personality) but my question is does he just like me alot or is he in love with me or what?
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